managing

   i have not written in a long time . i have actually been a little bit overwhelmed with life. most people are during the holidays, thanksgiving was great we enjoyed our family at our own house ,my kids had the whole weeek off actually we came up with new ideas to make us as a family work more efficiantly together. managing a family is challenging work . my son is having a hard time with anger management so i came up with the idea of journaling as a family so we all got a journal to write our daily excitements , or feelings in or what made us upset or frustrated a way to express emotions in a healthy way. my oldest son somehow along the way has decided that he is intitled to things. He doesnt understand how lucky he is, so im on a mission to clarrify that for him there are so many less fortunate people in this world i need him to realize that and learn to appriciate his things and also learn the value of a $1. im working basically full time now with customer service on the comp i love my job im totally good at making someone happythat calls initially very upset. im still struggling with home organization, but during our family meeting we talked about how we are all going to start making it a point to help eachother  because that would make us all as a family alot happier  and if everyone picks up after themselves then hey mom has more time to do fun stuff with them. i think we may have gotten our point across a little better this time. my son is learning to do the dishes and they are both signed up for the after school homework help program tues and wed and then on thursday its bible studies after school with the sunshine club football at the community center is over with now but basket ball is starting so we are going to let him have a try at that .
                                                  I have also added couponing to my life. i watched 2 episodes on tlc and thought omg if they can do it so can i . went to a couponing seminar at the union tribune and have beeen trying to learn the ropes.christmas  is comming and all my decorations are out i love this season im we have already got our boys what we wanted so the stress is gone so thats fantastic. i want to take the boys to volunteer somewhere maybee at a food bank or something  the focus is the spirit of christmas not just about presents from santa.

" silence "

                   Well it defiantly has been a little while sense I have blogged,that's the beauty of it though I can write what I want. I'm still on the right track, no one is perfect. Silence is something that I'm really not used to I usually speak it if I'm thinking it, which is not always a good thing. When your a kid you are taught that if you don't have anything to say than don't say anything at all, that is the right thing to do usually. You also need to remember that closed mouth's don't get fed either so if some thing is bothering you or weighing on your mind, if you are silent that is not good for anyone, it wont solve any problems, you cannot be positive and move forward without addressing whatever the issue may be big or small. I have learned to open my eyes and am able to view things with a different point of view. I really do feel as if I am on this journey to find myself, live my life in a way I never have before. I want to live it with enthusiasm excitement, pleasure, determination, happiness,  and complete awareness of all possibilities .  What usually causes you to be silent? fear - anxiety - doubt - confusion - lack of confidence - "silence is deadly" . It is such an easy thing to say you will do something, to want to do something, or even have the best intentions to do something. To actually do it is a little bit more difficult otherwise  it would have just been done (fixed).  "silence" is imperative only when you are supposed to be listening". Otherwise you'll never hear anything ,affecting your ability to move forward putting yourself in a rut. I  guess what I'm trying to get at is that learning when TO be silent and when NOT to be silent, also how to make that silence benefit you and not be harmful is one of the most important things you can teach yourself.

"feeling greatful"

                              feeling greatful. yesterday was my sons 8th birhtday  i felt like super mom i pulled together a surprise that shocked him i had quiet a few of his  friends come over and family too.  he had a great day and still gets to look forward to disneyland too. uno matter how much seems to be on your plate  if u truely believe things will just work themselves out they will..............................tiffany

"when i became a mommy" happy 8 birthday cj i love you"

i became a mom 8 yrs ago today <3

" Change is good "

                 When I think of change just like anyone else i instantly get paralyzed with anxiety. Change is not always bad it actually is good most of the time, its just a very scary thing. chapters of life unfold each day, every day is unlike the other it changes weather you recognize it or not. I started this blog to help me in my journey to change ......i want to change my life and mold myself , into the mother, into the wife, daughter, sister, friend, into the person i want to be. Only I can make that change for myself. So i started with changing my mind and acknowledging what i wanted to start with first. That is how my blogg came about ,using it as a tool to help myself be accountable for my day to day change to not get side tracked or discouraged by life and people and things around me. Staying positive and being grateful for every day that passes. i want to make the most of my life and lead by example. My oldest son has acknowledged my motivation for positive change and guess what? He is doing the same thing. ...................................................Tiffany
                  

Question of the day?  "How do you teach your child something when you dont know how to do it yourself?.......

"Self Sabotage"

                              So i woke up this morning feeling like i Had failed and it was my own fault. self sabotage,why do i always allow this to happen? I never do it with the intention of doing it, but yet i allow it to happen. I just cant put my finger on it quite yet, a good probability is I'm lazy. That's another thing on my list i would defiantly like to change but then how do u just stop being lazy? this is a question i haven't yet answered correctly. Is it just keep trying ? some day ill get the hang of it? "but i have been doing it that way my whole life and its yet to work"? the only other thing i can think of is just to do it. what i mean is if i think of something that needs to be done instead of just thinking about it just doing it . wouldn't it be awesome if it were just that easy? well that's what worked with quitting cigarettes i just stopped smoking them, yes i thought i wanted one but i just didn't do it. that has been my one true accomplishment ever the only time i didn't allow self sabotage to make its way in. it worked also with finding right exercise (haven't stuck to that like i want either) i went there knowing i was going to do something not yet quite knowing what it was "I was just going to do it" and there it was my gym developed classes with just the title for me i stuck to it for first 2 week then yup you guessed it SELF SABOTAGE omg ....it was cause i didn't have gas to get there, well that is what i allowed myself to accept as a great excuse to allow the sabotage to happen. how will i ever get what i want in anything in life if i don't just do it....hhmmm i have to ponder this thought for a moment..........................................................................Tiffany

"Taking my Time".............Learning and taking it all in.

                         These past couple of days i have let myself try and sit back and let the past week soak in. I find my self a little nervouse, any new adventures are. Instead of just jumping into it, want to allow myself to absorb information and be creative in my choices, i dont want to allow myself to get consumed by one thing i'm focusing on being a better me all around so in order to do that i need to learn to get organized. I made scheduals for myself for cleaning, excersizing, and im trying to make a dinner plan also this is along with kids after school classes their homework. I also am trying to take apart in a couple 31 day challenges one is love & marriage, and the other is making your home a haven. I wanted busy, well i got it thats for sure. I am also staying positve in every situation that is thrown my way. I have started to organize the space i have, to make every part function the best way it can, an office area, a place for storage and a place to take pictures with beautiful natural light, my living room is smaller, but yet it seems so much more cozy. i neede a crafting are also so ideas can be easily exsecuted, the same space needs to indeed be suitable for my family to use also. and be open and airy not smothering so organizing my thoughts is also a must to not overwhealm myself...... i feel optimistic for a change............change is good.
                

"Getting Organized"

           Organization....yes this has always been a dream of mine, well I can get things organized but keeping it that way has been a battle i have fought my whole life. Now I'm trying to teach my family and learn while I'm doing it. I have even made myself a weekly cleaning schedule (what to focus on each day). This is still my first week so I'm focusing on the daily basics and making boys accountable to do the same. I'm trying to make my home a haven focusing on making my space work for me. organizing thoughts, now that's when you have to take a deep breath. I figured out how to open a web site for my jewelry so I have to make some quick, I all of the sudden have so many ideas put into play, schedules I have made awesome wife, cleaning, football, tumbling, dinners, exercise, reading, I'm exhausted but yet I know I can get organized if We stick to it. I also need to find a book for me in that schedule somewhere  "hunting for inventory" days are soon .

Information Overload

                  my most favorite thing to do that brings me the most joy is treasure hunting as i call it . I love to go to the swap meet and to the thrift stores around and see what i can find sometimes i go looking with an item in mind and sometimes i just go with the excitement lets see what we can find. my family doesn't call them thrift stores we call them treasure stores it doesn't matter which one it is they all have the same name to us. "One mans junk is another mans treasure". scenes i have lost so much weight i have literally been through like every size clothing you could think of so i have done alot of clothes recycling as i call it with all my friends and family it got to the point if you came over you would leave with a great new outfit lol my sister would leave with bags full lol. this whole time my friend who loves shopping and finding a bargain just as much as i do had a brilliant idea to sell fabulous finds on computer. I'm like a dinosaur when it comes to the Internet.... so I'm taking another step in the right direction i did so many things i just thought i couldn't do learned how to open accounts,do a blog as you see, i have determination like i have never had before I'm reading other peoples blogs that are uplifting and i find myself being very inspired .....information overload but in a positive way learning that all is possible learning to have confidence in myself.

the courage to "put my big girl panties on" and venture out into this world

I woke up one morning a couple weeks ago and realized that the person that i have been lately is not who i want to be. now understand that i have great ideas and i am a great counselor for others and their problems, i am a great advise giver. If i could only take my own advise sometimes that would be nice.the realization that some where along the line i got lost and allowed myself to settle for just being. settling for less than i desire would be foolish and instead of focusing all my thoughts and efforts to the people around me, its time for me to do as i have NEVER done before and focus on me. "change your mind and your life will follow" i love that quote (don't remember who said it). This is the first time in10 yrs that we are a 2 car family and both my boys are in school. So not only do i have 6 whole hours , i now have the capability to leave my house. I can do anything i want.that brought on alot of anxiety for me.i felt like i had no faith in myself,I'm my own worst enemy.i always think that just because i don't know how or i have never done it before that "i couldn't do it".